I’m going to be honest right out of the gate.
Episode five didn’t just disappoint me — it actively irritated me.
And not in a fun, rant-worthy “what were they thinking?” way. This was something worse. This episode felt like a creative team completely untethered from Star Trek – besides the constant nostalgia bait. They’re desperately throwing everything at the screen in the hope that something — anything — will stick.
It didn’t.
What it did do was finally push me to the point where I can say, without exaggeration, that this show has lost me entirely.
Just look at the above official clips if you’ve not seen the show. It’s not Star Trek at all.
A cold open that tells you everything you need to know
Straight away, this episode feels aggressively non-Trek.
We open not with space, not with ships, not with a tone-setting moment of optimism or mystery — but with a pen scratching out the CBS text, followed by a drawn stick figure then spinning with a childish animation. Modern music kicks in underneath a voiceover from the hologram character, and her name is slapped on the screen… just in case you forgot who she was.
Which I had.
This entire opening feels like it belongs in a silly explainer video, a short-form animated series, or a documentary aimed at people with a five-minute attention span. Not a live-action Star Trek show.
And, it only gets worse from there…
Talking down to the audience
Throughout the episode, information is dumped directly onto the screen in large, obvious text. At one point we’re given this gem:
“Organics = Physical Body.”
I actually stared at the screen in disbelief.
This is a Star Trek show.
Even the new audience or fans that Paramount is so desperate to attract would understand this through dialogue alone. And the fans this show should be made for — the ones who’ve kept this franchise alive for nearly 60 years — absolutely do not need this spelled out like a PowerPoint slide.
It’s insulting.
And worse, it reveals a complete lack of confidence in the writing. If you need to explain your world with pop-up definitions, you’ve already failed at storytelling.
Star Trek has never needed this because it used to trust its audience.
Who is this show even for?
This episode really hammered home a question I’ve been circling since episode one:
Who is Starfleet Academy actually for?
It’s not for long-time Trek fans — because it constantly alienates them.
It’s not for new fans — because it relies heavily on references they won’t understand.
And it’s not even working as a numbers play.
This show can’t stay in Paramount+’s own Top 10 for more than 24 hours, regularly beaten by shows that are days, weeks, or even years old. The data is public. The evidence is right there.
Yet Paramount continues to ignore it and pump this stuff out.
Make Trek for Trek fans again — and the results will follow. This current approach defies logic. And Star Trek, of all franchises, should understand logic.
The Wall of Names strikes again
That wall of legacy names continues to irritate me — and this episode doubled down.
Nog is relegated to a lieutenant, from what I can see, so there’s no growth since DS9’s finale “What We Leave Behind.”
That alone should’ve set alarm bells ringing.
And then there’s Archer. Made an Admiral here — which directly clashes with the much more compelling Star Trek: United concept that’s been floating around, where Archer becomes President of the Federation. That makes more sense to me. That fits his legacy.
Academy says no.
Once again, this show locks future Trek into corners it didn’t need to create, all in service of shallow world-building that adds nothing.
And, if they wanted a genuinely funny background joke, they should have left Harry Kim as an Ensign.
“Look! Trek!” – the episode
This episode is wall-to-wall what the writers think are clever Trek nods.
They aren’t.
- Sam playing the Theremin-like instrument, much like the one used in the original series theme.
- Sam being called an “Emissary.”
- Baseball.
- Jumja Sticks.
- Constant musical stings referencing older shows.
Just stop it.
If Deep Space Nine had just copied The Next Generation, it would never have worked. DS9 succeeded because it added to Trek. It respected what came before without leaning on it as a crutch.
This show doesn’t add anything. It borrows. Poorly.
Tawny Newsome, Lower Decks energy, and tonal whiplash
Tawny Newsome appears in this episode — in alien makeup that honestly looked a bit off — and she also wrote the episode.
The moment she spoke, I immediately heard Mariner from Lower Decks, and I don’t mean just the voice. It was Mariner, and that may be part of the problem here.
That writing style works brilliantly for Lower Decks. It does not work here.
All the pop-up visuals.
The animations.
The exaggerated humour.
This episode feels like a Lower Decks script awkwardly stretched into live action — and the tone simply collapses under the weight.
And then the second Sam says she’s going to “solve what happened to Benjamin Sisko”…
Instant panic. This is where the episode crossed from frustrating into genuinely worrying.
Please. Leave DS9 alone.
The idea of these writers playing around with Star Trek: Deep Space Nine — a show with some of the best writing in television history — filled me with dread.
They haven’t earned that right.
And the episode knows it hasn’t, because it leans heavily on exposition. We get explanations of the Prophets. The Celestial Temple. Everything spelled out for non-Trek fans.
But again — this is meant to be a Trek show.
Trust your audience.
Or better yet: know your audience.
Cirroc Lofton: a welcome return that feels… wrong
Seeing Cirroc Lofton again genuinely tugged at me. There are moments where he feels like Jake.
But overall? Something’s off.
This isn’t Cirroc’s fault — it’s the writing.
Jake Sisko had a very specific cadence. A rhythm. A way of speaking that felt natural and timeless. Here, he sounds modern. His mannerisms don’t quite land. Yes, Jake would’ve changed after losing his father and becoming a father himself — but not this much.
And we already have the definitive Jake Sisko story in “The Visitor” — one of the most emotionally devastating hours of television ever made. That episode handles loss, grief, love, and legacy with grace and restraint.
This episode touches similar themes — and carries none of that weight.
Side plots, bars, and drunk holograms
The B-plot with Captain Ake and Kelric feels completely disconnected. There’s a scene involving musical preparation for another species that sounded uncomfortably like the Harry Potter theme — again reinforcing this bizarre Hogwarts obsession the writers seem to have.
The cadets also visit a bar. Fine. But it’s filled with awkward teen romance and visual noise.
Also, Sam the hologram gets drunk.
Why?
Even if it’s a programmed response, explain the purpose. Why does a hologram need to feel or act drunk?
Her character feels increasingly inconsistent, to the point where the writers themselves seem to forget she’s photonic — hence the constant on-screen reminders, like WordArt in a bad PowerPoint presentation.
There are more longing stares with more Twilight-level eye contact.
And yes — more childish jokes about erections and “morning wood.”
If that’s your thing, great.
It’s not Trek and it’s not for me.
A brief bright spot… and a painful reminder
I will say this: the updated CGI effect of the Bajoran Orb looked fantastic. Seeing it in HD just made me want one thing:
A proper DS9 remaster.
Come on, Paramount. It’s 2026. Star Trek’s 60th anniversary. Even if AI assistance is involved for cost purposes — it’s better than nothing. You’re leaving money on the table.
Star Trek fans are leaving your platform in droves, so you’re not making money from subscribers. You may as well make some from physical media sales, and at least they’d have correct episode descriptions and stills that match the episode titles.
And then… Dax
This is where I broke.
When Dax appeared, I audibly said: “Oh, fudge off.”
Yes, Dax can exist in the future.
Yes, it could be interesting.
But not like this.
Not as nostalgia bait written by people who fundamentally don’t understand why these characters mattered.
Stand on your own.
Forge something new.
Sisko… almost
We hear Avery Brooks’ voice at the end.
And yes — hearing Sisko again was lovely.
But please… leave Sisko alone.
If Sisko ever returns, it should be handled by writers like Ira Steven Behr and the original DS9 team — people who understand that story. Not this group.
Then the screen says: “Thank you, Avery.”
Honestly? Why?
It felt like a memorial card. If you want to thank him, do it in the credits — not in a way that feels oddly uncomfortable.
And then they play the DS9 theme over the end credits.
Just stop now.
Final Verdict
I won’t be watching this again.
Paramount should get subscribers through quality content and rewatchability. This show has neither. I’m only continuing out of obligation to review it.
All hope is gone.
This episode spent nearly its entire runtime teasing answers about Sisko — and delivered nothing. So what was the point? To show Sam that she can live her life her way while honouring the wishes of her species? That could’ve been done a dozen other ways.
This show isn’t Star Trek.
It’s a brand wearing nostalgia like a costume.
My score remains Major Reshoots Required — and honestly, I may need a new category entirely. One that says: “Don’t bother. Bin it.”
I miss Star Trek and I love Deep Space Nine.
I miss episodes like “In the Pale Moonlight”, “The Siege of AR-558”, “Duet”, The Way of the Warrior”, “Far Beyond the Stars”, and “The Visitor”.
That was excellence. I’d do anything for more Trek like that.
Starfleet Academy sadly has none of that excellence in the five episodes I’ve seen so far.
And at this point, that’s not just disappointing — it’s heart-breaking.
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